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Monday, June 02, 2008

Eeeew! Creepy Old Man ALERT

My friend Erin reminded me the other day for my propensity in college to attract freaks. I had selectively forgotten this strange phenomena. In college I had some strange encounters with the male persuasion. There was the guy who stared at me all semester in Art History and then chased me down the sidewalk on the last day of class. He asked me to go out. I said NO. He said WHY. I held up my hand and said 'I'm TAKEN.' He said, 'Oh, I guess I should have checked.' Duh. Then there was the guy from German class who stalked me, literally. He would park his Beetle next to my lovely gold station wagon and would always 'happen' to be at his car when I was coming back to my car. There was also the guy who pestered me to no end about my phone number so we could 'study together.' I kept telling him no. I thought he knew I was married. Apparently he didn't know or didn't care. Finally I told him I'd be happy to have him ask my husband for my phone number. The list goes on and on, and I haven't even mentioned the creepy old guy from the retirement home who wanted to take me to his room and show me his rocket ship. (He also claimed to be an astronaut.) I guess, in hindsight, my Grandpa really did have something to worry about. He gave me a cell phone, one of the 'original' phones that weighed 5 pounds and took up 3/4 of your purse. I think it would have been more effective to throw the phone at the creeps then try to call on it. Now that I think about all these incidents, I know why he worried so much. That, and I have my own kids now.

So anyway, there is a point to all this. I haven't really been bothered by any creepy guys asking for dates lately. But today, at the grocery store, the old guy bagging my groceries asked if I needed help carrying them out. I said 'No, thanks, I am fine.' He looked me up and down and said 'Well I can see that. Yes, you are fine alright. You look good, yes you do. I know you are fine.' Right then I wanted to run away, but I was waiting for my receipt. To his credit, I think, he seemed a few fries short of a happy meal if you know what I mean, but still. The cashier sort of smiled at me with a look that said 'Yeah, he's weird.' Apparently, the freak magnet is still working.

1 comment:

Phillip and Rachel said...

Let your freak flag fly Meg...