Garry, Garry, Quite Contrary: An Odor Clause???

***Names changed slightly***

So...let's chat about the guy who has showed me up to see the house a few times now, shall we? This guy, Garry, came to see the house, was appalled at the condition (we were too), but like the layout and was really interested. He wanted to bring his wife to see it, and set up an appointment for Wednesday. Well, he didn't show. Turns out, the story goes that he wrote it down in his planner as Thursday. Whatever. I gave him the benefit of the doubt since he had originally said Thursday, then said Wednesday was better. Funny thing is, I sent him an email too saying Wednesday, but obviously he didn't read it. This time, I wised up and told him to call me when he was almost there and I would head over. Guess what?! He never called. Bla. Bla. Bla. He got caught in a meeting at work. Couldn't call. Couldn't email. I have no idea why his wife couldn't have called. Anyway, we were just about done with him. However, he said he really wanted the house and had the application filled out. Given the current economic climate, we figure we better give everyone a good look and at least review the application. So, he set up an appointment for this Wednesday. Confused yet? Me too. He called at the last minute and asked to change the time. At this point I just wanted to show him and his wife the house and be done with it once and for all. So I said OK. I did tell him I had stuff to do and the time couldn't be adjusted yet again. After waiting for my limit of 20 minutes, I was just ready to leave when who pulls in? You guessed it. Garry and his wife. I showed them the house, again reassuring them that we will be replacing the flooring and painting the entire house, as well as necessary repairs (all of which we are willing to put in writing as part of the contract). While I was showing them the house, they started asking if this would be replaced, or that would be replaced. I was hesitant to give him a firm answer as I had no idea what Jeff had told him. While we are more that willing, and obligated, to make sure the house is clean and in good repair, we ain't promisin' the world, honey. The house is 50 years old! So, I again reassured them that we would write it into the lease contract. He called me that evening to say that they were really wanted the house, but were concerned about the odor. What would happen if the house still smells after new floors and paint? Could they get that in writing. I kindly explained to them that while we don't anticipate the smell lingering, and we don't want it to smell, odor is a subjective thing. By putting a 'smell' clause in the lease, they could basically walk away from the deal by saying the house smelled a little funny. Seriously? I explained to them that we wouldn't be able to do that. Then...oh, then, they emailed us about a few other things. They want to know if we will be replacing the appliances, because some of them look like they are not, and I quote, 'in the greastest condition.' We all know that used appliances are just not acceptable in a rental home and would of course be replaced, right? Not!!! So, we told him that the appliances were staying (unless they don't work) and that they can use their own if they want. At this point, do we really want to rent to them? Uh, no. What if a light bulb burns out? Would we get a call? We've decided that if they try anymore finagling we are just going to tell them that while the house will be presented in a clean, freshly painted state, with certain repairs made, it is AS IS and if that's not OK, then you might want to look elsewhere!!!

If you've made it to the bitter end, I am impressed. That was a rant alright. But guess what!? One week til the ultrasound!!! Start making your bets, folks! Will it be a boy or a girl? Or one of each? Just kidding about the one of each. Now that would be a shock and a half.