Friday, January 11, 2008

STOP Reading This Post...

This post is about poop. It will disgust you. I guarantee it is gross.

Don't say I didn't warn you.

Rach and Phil, this one's for you. It's better/worse/more disgusting than the raisin story, in my opinion.

Have I mentioned that James is in the potty training era of his life? He started asking to go so I jumped on the opportunity to work our way out of diapers. We went to the store and he picked out his very own undies: ones covered in cars and trucks. Now, in our house, 'unnies' are the season's latest fashions as they say on Nappy Dyn@mite. He is very good at going pee in the bathroom and has very few accidents with that. The only problem is, James is afraid to do certain business in the pot. OK. I already warned you. He refuses to POOP in the pot. Why? I don't know. He likes to do it surreptitiously and then come to me and say 'wet'. I bet that feels awkward, walking around with a big chunk 'o poo hanging out in your tractor undies. (Again, if you are still reading/cringing/disgusted...I warned you!) So anyway, yesterday afternoon he walked over to me with his ankles together like a penguin. At first, I thought maybe he wet himself. After all, he already pooped that morning. Why would he do it again? It was this same faulty reasoning that allowed me to let him go running around sans undies yesterday afternoon. Did I mention that my reasoning was flawed? Apparently all the multi-grain pancakes James eats have turned him in to a pooping ma-cheen. There, hanging out in the leg of his jammies was a giant blob-o-you-know-what. Eeeeewww! If you are wondering why James was in his jammies in the afternoon, he found his 'line' (lion) jammies in the closet upstairs and insisted on wearing them. They had an elastic band around the ankle, preventing the renegade poop from completely falling out of his pant let. Going back to the clean-up effort, I had quite a time extracting him and I think he was equally as disgusted as I by the 'nassy' poop smeared all down his leg. And his foot. And between his toes. Maybe next time he'll decide to use the pot when he goes. And maybe next time you'll listen when I tell you to stop reading a post. I told you it was going to be gross!


6 comments:

Jules said...

We started Jacob with potty training, but we're just excited that he'll sit on the potty. He wouldn't for the longest time. We told him James does along with a bunch of his other friends and gave him cookies and he sat on the potty yesterday for a few minutes. Of course nothing happened, but this was a milestone for him.I know he's just turning 2 but he always tells me when he has to go so I know he can do it if he can just get over his fear of the potty!

Phillip and Rachel said...

He he he...that was a good one Meg! Poor James trying so hard to become the master of his bodily functions...he can do it!!!

Trish D said...

Isn't motherhood grand? We have the opposite problem at our house - A is peeing in her pants daily. Big brother was nearly 4 when he was potty trained, and I thought the day would NEVER come; I thought she was going to be easier, but that doesn't appear to be the case. Sigh.

mcwiggins said...

Man, that's as good as the story about Mike regressing when his sister was born. Apparently he took to making deposits on the carpet behind the couch.

Ah, the glory of motherhood!

pianoguyonstage said...

That's it! Thanks for the warning. Next time we come over, I am going to check the corners for poo! Oh and don't bother serving us Mexican tacos with the big ol' chunks of beef in there.....

Jeff & Meg said...

Hmmm, starts with an E, ends with an ric. Sounds like you and me have similar problems, except yours is from a cat. As for the tacos, didn't Candi tell you that's what I am bringing for the kids' party?!