Spontaneous Adventure

For the last few years, I have been wanting to visit the Pennsylvania Farm Show. For various reasons, we haven't been able to go. This year, I totally forgot about it until I talked to a friend who was going. Turns out there was only a few days left, so we Jeff and I decided to take the kids on Friday. He took the day off and we took our clueless but excited children on a ride to Harrisburg. We didn't tell them where we were going until the car doldrums kicked in and the kids got antsy. They were pretty excited. Apparently they are having record attendance this year, so we had to park offsite (along with a million other people) and take a bus. A bus!!!! If you are 2, 4 and 6 years old, a bus is so much fun! Jeff found he no longer fits nicely in a bus, but that's what you get when you are 6'4" tall. 

The farm show is in a HUGE indoor complex. The website boasts 6000 animals, 10,000 competitive exhibits and two indoor arenas. We all enjoyed the Hitch and Pull show, where they had various draft horses come in and show off, mostly pulling some type of wagon. Katie was complete enthralled with the Cinderella coach, and James loved the covered wagon. The black horse on the bottom left was my favorite. It had the most beautiful and jingly harnesses on, and it had a beautiful way of running (prancing?).

The chickens! After lunch, the kids were super tired and the chickens were allllllll the way across the complex. I told Jeff we should just go, but he knew I wanted to see them so he said we should go see them. It was really cool. Now I know of two more kinds of chickens I want to get, and that I never want to raise a turkey. Those things are even bigger than I thought, and honestly they kind of scare me! The rooster on the top left was unbelievably tiny, even though you can't tell by the picture. The rooster in the bottom left was gigantic, although the picture doesn't do it justice. It was a Jersey Giant and I would not want to meet up with it in a dark alley. 

We visited the goats and sheep. I'll take one (or 6) of each, please! And a farm to go with it. The boys also loved sitting on the tractors they had everywhere. 

The food court was spectacular! Every 'council' was there promoting their own delicious food. There was the dairy council, the potato council (potato doughnuts, anyone?), the beef council, etc. After hitting up the dairy dudes for some 'toasted cheese sandwiches,' (is that what they call them in PA?) we bought the kids some whoopie pies. Whoopie pies, as far as I know are a Pennsylvania Amish thing. I don't really like them (except when I made these...oh, they were so good!!) The kids, however, loved them mainly because they are a) huge, b) sweet, and c) they each got their very own. For myself I visited my Maple Syrup peeps and bought myself a Maple Frozen Yogurt. It was so good it was ridiculous! 

Yes, we let the kids eat on the floor, the very floor where surely cows had trodden only hours before. The place was packed and there was not a table to be found anywhere. I tried to keep Tyler from putting his pie on the floor, with mixed results.

P.S. There is saran wrap under Katie's treat...just so you know :)

James was fascinated by the fact that the tire was taller than Jeff!

As you can see, we had a lot of fun. On the way out, we stopped at one last exhibit and got to talking with a Dairy guy. He was so darn interesting and we learned a lot. There was this huge yellow brush (like a bottle brush, only about 15 inches wide) on a fixture on the wall next to his dairy cow. I asked him what it was, and he said that when the cow goes up to it, it starts spinning and scratches her back and cleans her coat. He said the happier the cow, the more milk she gives. I'd say that is a very spoiled cow! He also told us that most dairies are using robots to milk now. The cows go in on their own. They have a tag that the robot recognizes, and it sends the information to the computer along with the amount of milk, time, etc.. This way they can track each individual cow and there is a lot less work involved. Who knew! And one more fascinating bit of trivia (or not) that I learned...I asked him why the show cows in the Dairy barn had such full bags. I felt sorry for them. One girl was actually icing down her cow's udders. According to the guy, they do that for show, even though its not very good on the poor mama cows. There you have it! Useful and exciting information you can use every day.

Tractor Square Dance

 

This was my favorite event of the farm show. Who ever heard of tractor square dancing! We actually got there about half way through the show, but it was still awesome. A caller calls out the moves and the tractors follow. Some of the guys had skirts hanging from their tractor seats like they were ladies dressed up for the dance. It is amazing how close they stay to one another without a collision. In the first video, you can see they formed a big 'X' for their finale. After they finished, the caller said 'Now they don't know I'm going to do this to them, but they all need to turn around and do that the other way.' They all shook their heads and then did it anyway. They all made tight little turns and faced the opposite direction in formation without crashing into each other.

Randomness Complete With Pictures!

Yesterday for Art Lessons we did life sized self portraits. I traced each kid on their paper and they went to town adding details. The only bad part about this project is what the heck do you do with a life-sized self portrait? Hide it in the garage until they forget about it? Hmm...

The boys have been wrestling more lately. The funny part is that Tyler can take James out. He just runs full force into James and tackles him.

Katie and Chappy: Cute!!

James and Chappy! Cute, Cute!

And both boys with Chappy: cute, cute, cute!

Is there anything more adorable than a boy in an earflap hat and a boy in a newsboy cap? Yes. A boy with an earflap had and a boy with a newsboy cap holding hands while swinging!

• And now for the random drivel news:
• I have a headache. I think it has something to do with the fact that Tyler screamed at the top of his lungs almost the whole way home from preschool. It was awesome. For whatever reason, the last two weeks he has been having issues leaving preschool and it gets ugly. I actually rolled the windows down hoping that it would help with the sound. Katie was upset and wailing loudly, and I wanted to stop the car and run for my life. (Is that terrible to say?)
• I'm not going to mention any names or anything, but the people who bring their kids here (starts with an S, ends with a chwartz)  for art lessons really need to take more pictures of their beautiful, adorable, prodigy, gorgeous, genius children, because when they come here they beg me incessantly  to take pictures of them! ;0)
• We still haven't got 'official' word for when the strike will be over. Geez! How long does it take to figure out. There was a news article today that said the strike will be over on the 20th, so we'll see if that's accurate. 
• Jeff starts class next week! (Not sure that is an exclamation of excitement or terror..ha!) After this semester he'll be done. Happy dance!!

And one more thing? Did you know that chickens have such luxuriously fluffy butts?  Don't say I never taught you anything! 

Change In Routine

Now that we are not spending our mornings getting James to and fro from school, I have to come up with a new rhythm for our days. This morning we ate breakfast, watched a cartoon, played with playdough, painted huge paintings, cleaned up the resulting mess, and played in the living room. And then it was 9 o'clock. I think I need to come up with a list of adventures and rainy day projects to do. There has yet to be an announcement as to how long the strike will last, so I have no idea how long James will be home. The funny thing is that last week when I dropped James off at school, I was thinking about how I missed having him at home and the adventures we can go on when he is. (All you mothers with school kids can laugh at me now! :) I guess I got my wish!

Trespassing: A Tale From The Franch

I was perusing ye old Franch files and found a few stories I forgot to post. Here is one:

 It was like a scene right out of a movie. I’ll do my best here to paint an adequate picture for you. It all started back at the farm. We spent all summer fixing up Jeff’s old Chevy pick-up. When Jeff had no farm work to do, we’d pull the truck up outside the shop and work. Sometimes we’d work at his Mom’s house too. The truck had significant rust damage, and let’s just say we used way more Bondo and duct tape than is recommended to restore the thing back to its original beauty. It was that summer that I earned the title of ‘Bondo Queen.’ I would do the Bondo and Jeff did the sanding. Anyway, after a summer of fixing up the truck, we had it painted. It sure turned out purdy. Unfortunately, due to the fact that Jeff was a poor college student commuting to and from school almost an hour each way, he decided to sell the truck and get something more fuel efficient. After all the work we had put into that truck, we decided to take it for one last hoo-rah. After all, that truck had gone on many a four-wheeling trip and had always served Jeff well. We decided to head out on Highway 6 &50, past Mack, and see where it went. We had never been much past the highly-esteemed Colorado Club. (Also known as the last stop on the edge of the edge, a seedy bar that attracted some really, shall we say, ‘interesting’ characters) To give you an idea of where we were, Mack is a town where there is all of 30 or so Post Office boxes. It is on the edge of the valley and consists of some very nice people and some very strange people. Like nudists, meth-heads, and other random assorted oddballs. West of Mack, well, there is a whole lot of nothing. It is only about 6 miles from the Utah border, in the desert. So, we headed off on the highway toward Utah. The highway pretty much disintegrated before our very eyes. The asphalt became more crumbly and patchy, and it was clear that the road was not frequently traveled or maintained. Somewhere around the Utah line, we decided to turn South. We just steered off the road onto BLM land and decided to see what was out there. We drove for several miles and of course, didn’t see a soul or any sign of civilization. Oddly enough, we ended up on some sort of ridge looking down on Rabbit Valley and the main interstate. There was no quick way to get down there, and as we soon realized, it was impossible. We decided to head back in the general direction we came, knowing we would eventually run into the highway. However! As it always seems to work, a fence appeared out of nowhere. A fence that stretched as far as we could see. I have no idea why or how we did not see it coming in, or how we got around it. Knowing we did not have enough gas left for a wild goose chase, we looked to find somewhere to pass through. We managed to find a gate in the barbed wire fence. Hanging at lengths along the fence were rusty old ‘No Trespassing’ signs, serving to ward off hooligans like us. Hanging on the gate was an even larger ‘No Trespassing’ sign, riddled with a few bullet holes seemingly put there for added emphasis. We decided we had no choice but to take our chances and head into whatever lay before us. I hopped out, opened the gate and closed it after the truck. We drove for quite a way before we saw what appeared to be the scene from a movie, off in the distance. There were a few rusty old trailers circled ‘round. There was your standard assortment of dilapidated old cars, surely housing the likes of raccoons, jackrabbits and other wildlife. There were rusty oil drums, broken tractor parts, and various ‘hey-I-might-use-that-someday’ odds and ends strewn about. I quickly told Jeff to slow down so we didn’t stir up too much dust. Nothin’ like trespassing on someone’s land and then stirring up a fit of dust to boot. So, we slowed to a crawl. That gave us time to spot them: three crusty old badgers sitting around in lawn chairs smoking and shooting the breeze. There may have been a can or six of beer sitting out. Clearly, they were sitting outside waiting for a UFO to fly over or something. Instead, they see a trail of dust in the distance, and a old but shiny green pick-up with two young whippersnappers driving up. My concern at this point was that they would take a shoot out one of our tires or something, just for sport and because we were trespassing. I was worried that since they clearly chose to live way beyond civilization, they would also feel beyond civilization's rules. And who wouldn’t want to have a little fun with two scared teenagers dumb enough to get lost and end up on private property with a near-empty gas tank? Jeff and I quickly debated the merits of stopping to explain ourselves vs. driving right past them. It became clear that we were the first human beings that had ventured into them-thar-parts in quite a while, as evidenced by their long stares. Every so often one of them would lean over and spit in the dirt. It really was like a movie, in slow motion. They didn’t take their eyes off of us, or we off them. We crept along, trying not to stir up dust, and decided that the best course of action would be to skip the pleasantries and head for the hills. So we did. We had to pass fairly close to these gents, and as soon as we were well enough past them, we sped up and high-tailed it for the highway. Fortunately, it wasn’t too much longer til we got to the road, and we managed to get to the ‘Last Chance Gas Station’ to fill up before we ran out of gas. That was close!

Strike

Our school district teachers are officially on strike. We are waiting to hear how long they will be allowed to strike before coming back to work. I am not happy with the whole thing. I'll save you from my soap box, but if you are curious you can go here and view a slideshow about it.

OTRW Jeff

When Jeff first started working at his current job, his coworkers were fascinated with his 'former life' in Colorado. All the stuff that seemed so normal to us was, apparently, very interesting. What?! You haven't skated around a dead steer with your honey? Oh. Back to my story. Jeff's coworkers loved to hear his stories, both of the farm he worked on in high school, and of his Uncle's ranch in Gateway, Colorado. They began to refer to these impromptu story times as 'On The Ranch With Jeff,' or OTRW Jeff for short. I have written about quite a few of our mutual tales from the farm (here), but not much about the ranch. My goal is to pester him  politely ask him to rehash the stories for me so I can record them for posterity. First, some background:

Jeff's Uncle lived and worked on a ranch in Gateway, Colorado, that had been in his family for several generations. Gateway is (was?*) a tiny little community so small that every graduate received a handmade quilt upon their graduation. (There were usually only one or two graduates, maybe three.) The ranch was 1500 acres, situated in a valley and running up to the mountain top. They had about 325 head of cattle. Jeff spent several months living and working on the ranch. He lived with his Aunt, Uncle, and cousin Amber.

And now on to the story (sorry...this post is getting out of hand!) Jeff had a new wrist-rocket style sling shot that he was dying to try out. He had found a handful of nuts (as in nuts and bolts) that fit quite nicely in his slingshot. He and his cousin were standing around outside the farm house while the chickens milled about. He saw a white chicken along the ditch bank and decided to take a shot at it. He hit what he was aiming for, and the chicken fell into the ditch. Jeff saw the mortified look on his cousins face and knew that he was in trouble. He was sure the chicken was dead. He ran to the ditch and reached in to grab the chicken. At the moment he reached in that chicken came to, flapping like crazy. It came flying out and scared Jeff half to death. I'm not sure who was more relieved in the end, Jeff or the chicken!

*I think Gateway has grown considerable since we moved, and for certain it has become much for commercialized. The owner of the Discovery channel decided he liked the area and began buying out everyone in sight. He said he wanted to keep the natural character of the place, then proceeded to build a big resort, a huge mansion complete with helicopter pad, and a car museum, among other things. 

The Garden

I will admit that by the end of September I pretty much had my fill of gardening for the year. I even slacked off in my obsessive habit of weighing everything. My best guess is that we got about 250 pounds of veggies last year. I still have a little parsley and rosemary growing which has been nice. Yet after only a few months of non-gardening, and with the arrival of the seed catalogs, I am going nuts! I want to go out and dig in the dirt and plant seeds and then pick baskets full of food. This winter I am planning on researching cold season plants and growing techniques so I can extend the season. (And I make fun of Jeff for reading books on Thermodyamics and Mechanics of Solids!) Maybe this year will  be the year I actually build a cold frame...we'll see. For now, I will have to be content perusing my seed catalogs and planning away. I asked Jeff what he would think if I turned our front yard into either an orchard or vegetable garden and all I got was an eye roll. I don't think its going to work. I need more space. Hmmm....maybe the neighbor's yard?! :)

Let's Not Repeat That

Last night I woke to the sound of our carbon monoxide detector beeping. I smelled oil and the furnace was misbehaving. It was 3:50ish in the morning. I woke Jeff up who promptly shut off the furnace and got to work. I moved the kids upstairs into Katie's room which we have been keeping unheated (she sleeps downstairs right now). It was reaaaaally cold, but mostly free of fumes. We ran the whole house fan, which helped with the fumes but pulled cold air in from outside. Alas, I'd rather be cold than the alternative. I am very thankful right now for carbon monoxide detectors and glad that the furnace is running again too.

Back To Our Regularly Scheduled Programming

After spending the last few weeks basking in the glow of Christmas cheer, I am forced to admit that the party is over. Grandma went home yesterday. James started back to school today. Jeff is back to work. We really enjoyed having family around and checking fun things off our Christmas to-do list. We even made Jesus a birthday cake, albeit a few days after the traditional day. It was quite amusing...Katie helped me with the cake, and she did the frosting and sprinkles. When we were admiring her work, James came in and asked if he could have a piece. I told him yes. Katie looked up at me and said 'But I thought we made it for God?!' James fired back with some comment to the affect that God wasn't going to actually eat the cake, and that he didn't like cake anyway, he liked fish. :) Other fun highlights of our Christmas festivities include:

• Playing tiddlywinks with Grandma (that game is way harder than it looks!)
• The whole family reuniting in a little Rhythm Band awesomeness (a tradition from our childhood...Grandma and Grandpa made instruments for all the grandkids and we would play Jesus Loves Me and others with our home-made instruments)
• Finally having someone to play Bananagrams with! Oh, how I love Bananagrams. Jeff, however, does not. 
• The girls (Mom, Grandma, Nikia and I) going galavanting through the countryside to New Hope and a few other places. It was awesome!
• Baking, baking, baking! And eating, eating, eating!
• Did I mention eating? And Dad made omelets. Omelets! That pretty much means I was in butter-dripping bliss. 

In other random news, Jeff just might be able to double up this semester and take two classes, which would hopefully mean he would graduate!!!! We are praying that everything will fall into place for this, because it would be so nice for him to be done. (Remind me I said that in a couple weeks when he has classes two nights a week and homework all the other days, OK? Thanks!) 

Anniversary

In honor of our 11th Anniversary, I shall re-post an entry regarding one of our more, uh, special (?) dating experiences:

The Tragic Frozen Steer Incident

A Tale from the Franch

One winter a steer wandered out on the frozen surface of the pond. As it reached the middle of the pond, the ice gave way under the steer’s weight. The poor thing thrashed around trying to get its footing but to no avail. Its owner managed to find the steer in time to try and rescue it. He threw a rope around its neck and tried to haul it out with his truck. It was futile. The steer died in the water and was wedged in such a way as to make it impossible to get out. The ice closed in around it and suspended the carcass in the surface of the ice. A hump remained jutting through the ice to remind us of what was there. That winter, we ice skated around the steer. Why waste a good opportunity to skate even if there is a dead carcass frozen in the middle of the ‘rink’? It stayed planted there till spring began to thaw the ice. We walked out to look at it and saw that the catfish had hollowed out the rib cage entirely. There was even one darting in and out as we watched: the food chain at work. When the ice was soft enough, they got the steer out and we went back to swimming in the pond with the carnivorous catfish. Can you tell there was a lack of cultured entertainment during our dating years? Nothing encourages romance like skating hand in hand around a dead steer. You should try it sometime.

And The Winner Is....

For the last few Christmases, we've taken the kids to the dollar store to pick out gifts for the family. They each choose a gift for their aunts and uncles, Grammy and Chappy, Grandma and Aunt Sally. They really pick some hilarious gifts. Last year's highlight was a magnetic mirror, which whistles at the reflection upon opening the little plastic door. Katie picked that out for Chappy. This year, James took the win for creative gift giving. He picked out three gifts that may tie for first place as far as odd gifts go. First, he bought Dad a roll of trick toilet paper. You can never unroll it. As soon as he saw it hanging there in the store, he proclaimed 'I'm getting this for Chappy!!' and put it in the cart. He couldn't stop there, though, and also picked out a pair of slinky-like eyeball glasses also for Chappy. When he saw a package of three pairs of redneck teeth, he picked them up for Grandma. I thought it was funny at the time but I had no idea there was logic behind the purchase. When Grandma opened them, he told her he got them for her because she had lost a tooth. That kid has got our sense of humor for sure! I can only imagine what Tyler will pick out next year when he is old enough. No doubt it will be awesome!

PS. James was so proud of himself for picking out a pen for Jeff at the school store. He got it so Jeff could use it at work. When Jeff opened it, we realized it was inscribed with 'Mom.' :)

And A Good Time Was Had By All...

Phew!

The Christmas festivities are winding down and we are left with a pile of wrapping paper and a lot of good memories. The older I get (ha, ha! cracks me up to say that...) the more I think I appreciate Christmas. I love celebrating the birth of Christ, spending time with family, and watching the kids experience the special times. This year I think the kids are understanding more about the meaning of the season, and of course they get excited about all the festivities that go along with it. We have had a lot of fun this month, and I am happy to say that we have checked all but two things off our Christmas fun list. Tomorrow we are going to make a birthday cake for Jesus, which will leave only one item left on the list. More pictures to come!

Busy

Things are busy around here. Grandma is here. (yay!!!!!!!!) I asked her if she move in with us but she declined. Boo! I guess Florida has its perks. Not to mention its probably a whole lot quieter. In other news, I hosted a kids' cookie decorating party on Saturday. It was a lot of fun, even if only only two kids could actually come. Amazingly, my kitchen fared pretty well, although I can't say as much for the 8 bottles of sprinkles I had for the occasion. Let's just say that they hit the sprinkles pretty hard. They also made an ornament while they were here. On Sunday, I filled in to teach the 4 year old class at church. It was my first time teaching at Bible Fellowship, and it was baptism by fire! They were anticipating low turnout, and the 3 year old teacher couldn't make it, so they combined classes. I ended up having 21 or 22 kids. There is also an autistic boy in there who normally has a 'shadow' and they didn't have one for him that day. I kept him from escaping so I feel pretty good about that. Fortunately they sent me two very helpful teenagers to assist. My favorite part of the day was when a kid in class held up his play dough creation and declared that he had made the 'devil' which was really just an amorphous blob of play dough. There was a woman who happened to have popped into the class for a bit, and I think she was totally appalled with the kid. She told him he should be making Jesus instead. I thought it was kind of funny, and certainly creative.

The Par-tay

Oh, look! I have my eyes closed again! (My trademark, apparently...)

Jeff's party went pretty well, all things considered. I ended up meeting a cute little lady and her husband who are from China and moved to the US. They were new to the company so we sat with them, which means I didn't have to sit next to someone creepy or weird. She was really sweet and it was very interesting to talk to her about cultural things. Having her sitting next to me kept the awkward at bay, for the most part. I did have to roll my eyes when I met one of Jeff's coworkers and he had forewarned his girlfriend about Jeff. Awesome. His reputation proceeds him. I met another one of Jeff's coworkers and after a few minutes of superficial conversation, she told me that she was surprised I seemed normal because I had chickens. She said she was expecting someone 'more...uh...farmy.' That was funny. Who actually says that kind of thing out loud?

Here's my dress...finished with not much time to spare

Christmas Party

Tonight is Jeff's Christmas party. It is quite a fancy event, and fortunately I finished my dress in time. Unfortunately, I have a lovely and glaringly large bruise on my arm that wraps around to my elbow. I got it from a routine blood draw for my Thyroid check. It is quite super, since my dress is sleeveless. Jeff has suggested make-up, which I am afraid will rub off on the dress. I think I will either go with a shawl (wrap?) or a cardigan...hopefully! Tonight also marks the one time every year where I wear pantyhose. Seriously, who invented those? You pay like five or six bucks for a pair and they snag the first time you wear them. Anywho, tonight we will get all shined up and go eat fancy and delicious food with a bunch of tipsy engineers who may or may not talk about playing Dungeons and Dragons in their basement, or the best way to build a nuclear storage cask. Wish me luck! :)

Hey There, Puddin'

Occasionally someone stops me and tells me how they always wish they had curly hair. I think this is part of the 'grass is always greener' syndrome. In high school, I used to want straight hair so bad. Then I gave up and decided that people actually pay to have curly hair, and mine came for free so I might as well like it. The problem with curly hair is that every single morning I look like Tina Turner after a fight with a Flowbee. If I don't put copious amounts of mousse in it each day, my hair turns from the aforementioned disaster into something of Lion King-like proportions. Recently it dawned on me that...duh!!! I should try out the products in the 'ethnic' section. When I was at Walmart, I perused the ethnic section and found that the clientele apparently like their hair products to sound like food. After perusing such products as Hair Mayo, I settled upon a tub o' Hair Pudding. No joke. And the thing is, it works! I am a new fan of the Puddin'. It even comes with an awesome disclaimer that says 'Hair is flammable. Hair is even more flammable with product in it. Avoid flames.' Thank you, hair pudding, for that timeless advice. From here on out, I promise not to tuck a lit cigarette behind my ear, or try to curl my hair with a red-hot poker.

Christmas Ornaments

My bird ornament collection: I had to get creative and hang them from a branch on the ceiling this year to keep them away from the Tylerist.

 I know a lot of people have a tradition of buying an ornament of significance every year. We do too, although my Mom may have taken it to a whole new level. We usually end up with several new ornaments each year, each with a memory attached. It is so fun to take each ornament out and remember the story. Some of the more unusual ornaments we have were ones my Mom made for us. I believe my brother has a small wagon with a few of his teeth glued in it. My sister has one with a piece of the body cast she was in as a baby. (She also has hip dysplasia, like Katie.) I have one that was made from the horrendous contraption I had to have in my mouth because I couldn't stop sucking my thumb. I like the way she made it look so cutesie. Don't be fooled! That thing was awful.

But now, it makes for an awesome and very unique ornament!  (It is missing a piece on the side now)

I seem to have carried on the tradition, because I have already made my kids some strange ornaments. I stuffed fake pine boughs and pine cones into James' baby shoe, and glued a bow on it to signify the year he learned to walk. I had the doctor cut a small piece of Katie's second cast to be made into an ornament. He was kind enough to let me pick where I wanted to cut, and I chose the ankle, where she had worn through the cast dragging herself around. Can't forget that!

 

I made an ornament from James' NICU bottle, and inside are the cables they had him hooked up to to monitor his breathing. This one always makes me so grateful that he is here and healthy!!

This cupcake ornament has the best story of all our ornaments. I got the idea to post it from my friend Linda, who posted her favorite Christmas decoration today.  When my Dad and his siblings were young, Aunt Sally have them this ornament. Never mind that there were three of them. Somehow this ornament became kind of a fun joke, and it was decided that whoever married first would get the ornament. For my parents wedding, my great grandma wrote and read a poem about the soldier. When Jeff and I got married, someone added verses to the poem and my Aunt Lynn read the poem at our reception, where we were presented with the cupcake. Now it sits high on our tree so the kids can't reach it.

 

And my favorite Christmas decorations of all, the stockings my Grandma cross-stitched for us!! They are not pre-printed. Every single thing is made up of teeny-tiny stitches. They are so beautiful.

  

And now I'm off to finish this dress! I don't think I want to wear it with the pins, but Jeff's Christmas party is coming up and I had the brilliant idea of making my own dress. Well, it would have been brilliant if I did it like a month ago. Now I have way too many projects to finish before Christmas. Oi!

Fun Lists

I am pretty good at coming up with ideas, but they don't always get done. We are forever saying 'oh, we should do that sometime,' then never actually doing it. To alleviate that, last summer the kids and I came up with a list of all the things we wanted to do over the summer. It worked out well, and so we are bringing the list back for Christmas! Here are a few things on our Christmas to-do list:

• Bake cookies
• Drink hot chocolate
• Make snowflakes
• Read Christmas books
• Decorate the front window
• Make clothespin and candy cane reindeer (Check!)
• See the lights (preferably more than once)
• Make gingerbread houses
• Have a family (Christmas) dance party

Having kids gives me plenty of excuses to do all this fun stuff!

I'm Not Going Tell You What It Is....

Yesterday James had his school 'Holiday Shoppe.' I fondly remember mine from childhood, being able to choose from loads of cheesy trinkets. At the time, of course, the stuff they sold seemed wonderful, and each choice was made with the utmost care even if I did choose a pet rock. Now James has the chance to make his own momentous purchases. Having no idea what things at the store cost, I sent him several bucks for each of us. He came back with plenty of change, and a spring in his step. He ran out of school, saying "I'm not going to tell you what I got you, but you're going to love it!!!" As we walked home, he would turn around and say things like 'they are clothes, but I'm not going to tell you' or 'they are warm and fuzzy and you're going to love them.' It didn't take me long to figure out that he had gotten me socks. Then he turned and said 'It starts with an 'S' Mom!' Bingo! I was right. When we got home, he wanted me to look in the bag and see my socks, because to quote James 'you'll forget by Christmas anyway.' I opened the bag to find....no socks. Instead, the most obvious choice for a mom gift was a compact covered with faux bling. I held it up and he looked at it, confused. 'Oh, I thought I got you socks,' he said. I think he must have changed his mind at the last minute, then forgot. I just found it amusing that he spent the whole way home telling me (without telling me) what he got me, only to have it completely wrong.

P.S. Jeff did his final presentation last week for his Senior Design project and he did great! The professors said he did a very nice job  and was very professional. No surprise! One more class down, only TWO to go!

It's That Time Of Year......

...for Jeff to bust out his giraffe-sized footie pajamas. Despite the fact that they make him look like a smurf on juice, he wears them quite often! I recently found out that my lovely sister in law thought the footies were just a joke. No, they are not! So here you go, proof that they exist! :)

Rock-a-bye Me

For the last few months, Tyler has had an endearing habit of saying 'rock-a-bye me, Mama.' Its pretty much the cutest thing ever. How can I resist but to rock the little guy until he crawls out of my lap to run and play? He rarely slows down so I take it when I can get it. Then, several weeks ago, he took it to another level by standing up in his crib, wrapping his arms around me and rocking me back and forth gently, while saying 'rock-a-bye, rock-a-bye, rock-a-bye.' I pretty much melted right there on the spot. Now, everyone lines up at his crib at night, wanting Tyler to 'rock-a-bye' them. I have to say he will usually do it for me, but often sends the kids packing. It hurts their feelings, but I have to say it makes me day! He loves his mama. :)

Thanksgiving Pictures (Mercifully Pooptastrophe-Free)

The Guests (One of our traditions is to invite random people who don't have other plans. Its fun!)

Another tradition: Marshmallow gun fights! We started out with homemade guns, then every year someone shows up with something a little different. Straight copper tube=faster marshmallows according to some. My sister-in-law's dad conducted tests on the velocity of various marshmallows and determined that colored are best. This year, we added some store bought guns which were easier for the kids (no wind power needed). My brother in law shows no mercy to anyone, including the kids. And let me tell you, getting hit in the back of the neck at close range really hurts!

Big T and Aunt Sally

My super awesome sister and sister-in-law!

My bro (he's pretty awesome too, but don't tell him I said that! ha! :) He was the one who took out the fence while I was chasing him. I think it was a proud moment for our parents!

Kid-Made Christmas Gifts

The kids are making gifts for each other this year. I will be posting the ideas on the craft blog in case you are interested. My two requirements are that the crafts are easy and cheap! :)

More Randomness (And A Picture of The Infamous Black Jesus))

 Here is James, sitting proudly on his life-sized Lincoln Log toilet. Yes, he is a clever child. With a strange sense of humor...where did that come from!? He even put small Lincoln Logs in the toilet for realism. Nice.

 Here is Jeffrey's pile of reading. He has been working an obscene amount of hours on his Senior Design Project, designing a replacement heat exchanger for a power plant in Kentucky. His reading list includes such page turners as 'Vector Mechanics for Engineers,' and the big one on the bottom, 'Mechanical Design of Heat Exchangers' which was written by the owner and VP of his company. As we speak, he is giving his final presentation which I am sure is going swimmingly. We can't wait to have him back as a member of the family again!

 The other morning when I was out tending to the chickens, Tyler got his pants a little muddy. He told me they were dirty and I told him we would change them when we went in. He took matters into his own hands, channeling his Auntie Rachel, where he dropped his drawers and 'washed' them in the rainwater in my garden cart.

 Where's this kid's mother? He's out in a saggy diaper washing his own pants. Some people!

 Mom showed up to 'do the deed' straight from her day job as a counselor. Have you ever seen such a sassy (chicken) assassin? Mom is a counselor, and I told her she probably should keep her nighttime activities on the DL!

Here it is, the picture that has been passed around for the past 15 years or so. It may be getting a little faded by now, but He's still in the original plastic wrap. I must say it is one of the most entertaining $1 investments I have made.

• And the rest of the randomness (also known as the longest post ever)......
• Well, the deed has been done. Katie will probably be in therapy in 20 years. She was very sad about her chicken, and was up til after 9:30 crying on and off. Then she asked where it was. Umm...in an Amazon box sitting on the dryer? (I didn't actually tell her that, but its true. I don't want any predators finding it before trash day and thinking that chicken is tasty.)  I tried to explain to her that it was sick and suffereing and might get the other chickens sick but I think all she heard was 'bla, bla, bla, we killed your favorite chicken...' James requested the feet, because we are high-class like that. If you're lucky I'll make another post about the wonder that is a chicken foot.
• Yesterday I found two baby carrots shoved inside the roll of toilet paper in the bathroom. I also found a half eaten (including half the core) apple in the bottom of my purse. That would explain the large cloud of fruit flies that's been following me around! ;)
• Today was my day to teach preschool. Not sure who gets more excited, me or the kids. I was surfing the internet last night and found a build your own snowman craft that was too cute. I ditched the pipe cleaner/bead snowflakes and cut out felt snowman parts. I was scrounging around in the dark last night finding twigs for the arms. We also worked in the googly eyes...everything is better with googly eyes! As seems to be the norm for me, we went off our schedule in order to fit in the activities. There are just too many fun things to do, and not enough time!
• Now this might fall into the category of TMI for those of you who don't have kids, but Tyler actually peed IN THE TOILET today. I was thrilled! While part of me wishes I had some sort of perpetual snuggly baby around forever, I would be quite happy to stop buying diapers. I have already decided that potty training will only happen when Tyler wants it to happen, so I am hoping the interest remains.

Random (Part 896.29)

• James started back to school on Monday after 9 days off. It's sure easy to get out of a routine, but also nice to find it again.
• Big Martha is coming along nicely. She was in lock-down for a while, but today she is back with the girls and I have been watching them closely and there seems to be no pecking. She is keeping to herself though. 
• Chicken Dumpling is sick. Well, now she is acting fine, but yesterday she was all twisted up and could barely stand and had no balance. It has been recommended that she be 'culled,' the nice way of saying killed. She still hasn't laid any eggs and she seems like she is 'not all there' anyway, so after yesterday's episode it seems that she has serious issues. I tried to psych myself up to 'do the deed,' but Jeff failed to provide any sort of moral support (AKA 'They're your chickens, you do it!') and I didn't feel like I can do it myself yet. Thankfully, my mom is coming over later today to do the deed. Maybe if I watch it enough times I will be able to do it myself. Not that I want to, but I feel like I should be able to should the need arise. Now that you have lost your lunch, I will change the subject. (You're welcome! :)
• Over the weekend, I had the most hilarious interchange with a neighbor. He came over to talk to Jeff and I saw him outside. I decided to go out and offer him some of the incredibly decadent 6 layer salted caramel chocolate cake I made for Thanksgiving because it really shouldn't be consumed in more than small doses. He accepted, of course. I turned around to go get some cake and I heard him say (now mind you he is in his late 60's, early 70's) "Hey, you've got great buns!" Now, we talk to this neighbor all the time and never has he said anything like this. I wasn't quite sure what in the world was going on. I turned around to see Jeff standing behind him, cracking up. I started laughing. The neighbor said "I have no idea how you get them so light and fluffy!" Well, I'll tell you, buddy, not just anyone can have buns as light and fluffy as me. Seriously though, it was then I realized that he meant the cinnamon rolls I had brought them the day before. I busted out laughing so hard I had to turn around and walk into the house. I later asked Jeff if he thought that the neighbor ever caught on to what he said, and Jeff said no, he didn't catch it. Too bad for him, because it has given us a bunch of laughs since then.
• James informed me today that when he burps or farts and I am not there, he says 'Excuse Me' to God. That cracked me right up! I asked him if God told him 'You're excused, goof ball' and he said yes. That kid is a nut.

Not Soon Forgotten: A Thanksgiving To Remember

This Thanksgiving could be remembered by the fun time spent with family and friends. It could be remembered by the epic dessert table, including plum torte, blueberry pie, and a six-layer salted caramel chocolate cake. Perhaps we could remember this Thanksgiving by the beautiful weather, or the multiple rounds of marshmallow gun fights. It could be remembered by those things....but it probably won't be. No, this Thanksgiving will likely go down on the record books as the year of The Great Thanksgiving Poop-tastrophy. It all started innocently enough. My brother nailed me with a marshmallow gun and I took off after him. We were chasing each other around the yard at top speed. Nate ran around the side of the house and I thought I would have him cornered. Instead, at the last minute, he decided to jump the fence. I lunged for him, he didn't quite manage to clear the fence and instead took the entire fence OUT, like pulled out of the ground out. I was laughing so hard, mid-air, and I fell to the ground still cracking up. I rolled over and realized that I had landed right in a stinking pile o' dog poo. Sorry, folks, but there's really no way to sugar coat that one. It was pretty much the grossest thing ever. There were some (un)helpful suggestions that it can't really be that bad, because after all, 'you deal with kid poo all day.' Au contraire! First of all, kid poop is removed from cute little kid butts. Yes, it stinks, but not nearly as bad as a dog's. And it doesn't come in quantities large enough to pass for elephant dung. Also, last time I checked, I don't roll in it. If Henry the dog were not so darn cute, he would have plummeted in poopularity with me. (har, har!!) After going home to bathe myself in Purell and more Purell, I returned to the festivities in fresh attire. The awesome part is that we invited some friends from our church (also from our preschool co-op). It was great. Nothing like having new guests over, then impressing them by chasing my brother all over the place and rolling in dog poo. It gives me the warm fuzzies just thinking about it. Not! Note to self: Never, ever, get a dog!!!

If you don't mind a little poop humor, here are a few titles I considered for this blog post:


And They Called It Poopy Love
Scattered Thoughts About Thanksgiving
Who Dung It? A Riveting Thanksgiving Tale
A Tale of Sibling Love: So Fascinating and Heartwarming It'll Have You Hanging on Every Turd

OK, OK! I'll stop now...:) My mother has probably disowned me by now! ha! 

Chicken Emergency

Yesterday I was herding the chickens back into their enclosed run when I noticed that Big Martha was bleeding. She is the flightiest of our chickens, and it was a pain to catch her. When I did I found that she had a pretty big gash on the end of her back, about 1" by 2". It was really gross. I couldn't figure out what in the world could have happened. They were only out for an hour and Jeff was sitting at the kitchen table and didn't hear any squawking. I took her inside and wrapped her up in a towel so she couldn't flap her wings. She was actually pretty calm. Jeff helped me hold her while I washed out the wound and used hydrogen peroxide and neosporin. I tried to wrap it up but of course she was having none of that. After talking to my friend Linda, we think it was a skunk that attacked her from behind. We have had skunks in our neighborhood in the daytime, which according to the Animal Control people is not out of the ordinary and does not mean they are rabid. Linda said that skunks are vicious and nasty and really bad around chickens. Now Big Martha has to be on chicken lock-down because the others peck at the wound, the chicken version of kicking someone while they are down. She will have to stay caged up til she gets better. I made her a little living space which we have dubbed the 'double wide trailer,' which is two storage bins zip-tied together with an opening between them.

Life And Times Of A PK

Today I was talking with some peeps from church and I discovered that I was talking to a former pastor. We got on the subject of being a 'PK' (Pastor's Kid) and the interesting shenanigans that PK's get involved in. It got me thinking about some amusing times, so here are a few things I remember, in no particular order:

• When my brother tried to use the 'I didn't bring my Bible because we don't have Bibles in our house' excuse (There was also the 'There was lots of traffic on the way to church and that's why I was late' excuse.) 
• The time my brother tied my dress to the chair. When we stood up to sing my dress ripped (fortunately not too much).
• Playing hangman on the back of the bulletin with my Mom during Dad's sermons
• Drawing people in the middle of church (the backs of their heads) and making Mom guess who it was
• I once drew a detailed portrait of Evora Rippy, complete with her yellow polka-dotted polyester blouse, polyester pants, and ever-present corset (Yes, that was her real name)
• Moving all the chairs to the side of the sanctuary and bring our boombox down. My friend Kim tried to teach me to line dance late at night in the church sanctuary.
• During my childhood years, I believe I folded and stuffed approximately 16, 482 bulletins, give or take.
• When we lived in California, we figured out that we could break in to the church nursery window, climb through, and run down the hall to disarm the alarm before it went off. (Side Note: The secret code was the reference to one of Mom's favorite verses)
• We could do a mean impression of Dave Epps or Mel Dietz praying.
• I once found a portrait of a black Jesus with dreadlocks and light shining down from heaven on him. It was so amusing, and I bought it just so I could sneak into my Dad's office before the Sunday morning prayer meeting and hang it up. It was awesome, and black Jesus has been circulating back and forth ever since.
• Once, at the pastors' conference we went to every year, my brother, myself and a few fellow PK rebels bought magnetic nose rings on the boardwalk. We waited til all the pastors and their families were gathered in the dining hall for lunch, and we sauntered in to see what reaction I got. I think we raised a few eyebrows, but if I remember correctly my parents weren't fooled. 

It's Shoebox Time!!!

Argh, Matey!

I think Tyler might be on the verge of re-discovering that he can climb out of his crib. I say 're-discovered' because a while back he figured it out but I think he forgot or gave up after he had fallen on his head a few times. Now, he can climb out or stand up on the crib rail to look out the window. This can't be good. Any of you who know the mini-beast know that he is, uh...energetic? Translated: the kid is nuts. I can only imagine that teaching him that he has to actually stay in his bed for naps and bedtime is going to require the patience of a monk. Just last night, he decided to chuck his beans off his plate because he didn't want them. I told him to pick them up and put them back on his plate. I got a loud 'NO!!!!' I told him he either needed to pick up his beans, or sit in timeout til he was ready. It went on for 45 minutes. Seriously. He wasn't crying or screaming, just stubbornly refusing to pick up even one bean. He just sat there. Finally, he nonchalantly went over the table and picked up the beans and.....ate them!!! Recently a friend of mine watched him along with the other preschool siblings, and I always have to ask how he did. She said he was a little rough and had to take some time outs, but that he was so pleasant. Yes! That's how he operates. He can be such a stinker, but so darn sweet too. All that said, the imminent transition from crib to bed has me a little leery. Maybe I'll get lucky and he'll forget again that he knows how to escape his crib. Ha!!

*Public Service Announcement*

James has lost his first tooth!! He is so excited it is hilarious. He came running out of his room last night holding it in the air and jumping up and down. You'd think he won the lottery. He called Chappy to tell him the good news, then we told him he actually needed to sleep at some point. Now he is working on wiggling another one loose. It is hanging on, but just barely. I'll post pictures of the new gap as soon as I can get a decent picture of him.

Everyday Pictures

James has been back into blocks lately. Here is one creation he was particularly proud of. He benevolently flashed me one of his nicest expressions, as you can see.

We had our friends Jenni and Danny over on Sunday, and our girls loved playing together. They got dressed up as princesses and some sheer curtains so they could get married. The groom? Joann's little brother, Armando. He was not interested in the proceedings.

Leaves at Grammy and Chappy's house (everything is more fun at their house!)

Can you handle the deliciousness?!

Good thing the little stinker is so cute! :)