Saturday, November 26, 2011

Not Soon Forgotten: A Thanksgiving To Remember

This Thanksgiving could be remembered by the fun time spent with family and friends. It could be remembered by the epic dessert table, including plum torte, blueberry pie, and a six-layer salted caramel chocolate cake. Perhaps we could remember this Thanksgiving by the beautiful weather, or the multiple rounds of marshmallow gun fights. It could be remembered by those things....but it probably won't be. No, this Thanksgiving will likely go down on the record books as the year of The Great Thanksgiving Poop-tastrophy. It all started innocently enough. My brother nailed me with a marshmallow gun and I took off after him. We were chasing each other around the yard at top speed. Nate ran around the side of the house and I thought I would have him cornered. Instead, at the last minute, he decided to jump the fence. I lunged for him, he didn't quite manage to clear the fence and instead took the entire fence OUT, like pulled out of the ground out. I was laughing so hard, mid-air, and I fell to the ground still cracking up. I rolled over and realized that I had landed right in a stinking pile o' dog poo. Sorry, folks, but there's really no way to sugar coat that one. It was pretty much the grossest thing ever. There were some (un)helpful suggestions that it can't really be that bad, because after all, 'you deal with kid poo all day.' Au contraire! First of all, kid poop is removed from cute little kid butts. Yes, it stinks, but not nearly as bad as a dog's. And it doesn't come in quantities large enough to pass for elephant dung. Also, last time I checked, I don't roll in it. If Henry the dog were not so darn cute, he would have plummeted in poopularity with me. (har, har!!) After going home to bathe myself in Purell and more Purell, I returned to the festivities in fresh attire. The awesome part is that we invited some friends from our church (also from our preschool co-op). It was great. Nothing like having new guests over, then impressing them by chasing my brother all over the place and rolling in dog poo. It gives me the warm fuzzies just thinking about it. Not! Note to self: Never, ever, get a dog!!!

If you don't mind a little poop humor, here are a few titles I considered for this blog post:

And They Called It Poopy Love
Scattered Thoughts About Thanksgiving
Who Dung It? A Riveting Thanksgiving Tale
A Tale of Sibling Love: So Fascinating and Heartwarming It'll Have You Hanging on Every Turd

OK, OK! I'll stop now...:) My mother has probably disowned me by now! ha! 


Trish D said...

Wow, now THAT'S what I call memorable!! (I have a variety of other comments which I will keep to myself. You're welcome.)

Shay said...

oh my word, nasty!!! nothing stinks like dog poop, seriously.

Phillip and Rachel said...

Hahahahahahahahahaha...hanging on every turd! You are so funny Meg :)

Ms. Mc said...

OMG hilarious.... actually it could have been worse - this one time, Maxwell rolled in bobcat crap (we think) and it was gag-tastic. UGGGG.