Suitable Programming

At the risk of sounding like one of those 'when I was your age' finger-shaking curmudgeons, I must say that my list of suitable TV programming for the kids is shrinking. If it weren't for the fact that I like to take a shower in peace, I just might scrap it all together. However, it sure is convenient sometimes. We don't have cable, so that rules out just about everything. What is left is PBS, Qubo, and occasionally the Smile of a Child network. I have various beefs with these stations. Qubo is annoying, because every 3 minutes or so, there is an infomercial. These infomercials are selling two things: things your kids will beg you to buy and things that old people need, like scooters and life alert. I don't really know how those two things mesh, but whatever. All the commercials are annoying and I don't like my kids being assaulted by consumerism. Smile of a Child is a Christian channel, and I don't worry that they are going to see on there. It is simply a bunch of reruns of old-school stuff, including Superbook. However, there is this gentleman who does story time that leans forward and lectures the kids in a fire and brimstone kind of way, which is a little weird. I usually don't have to worry about this, because that station rarely comes in. And PBS, oh, PBS. I love PBS. I hate PBS. I feel like of all children's shows, theirs have the most propaganda. There are shows teaching children to tell their parents to Reduce! Reuse! Recycle! and to get all their shots, the flu shot, and heaven forbid you remove the stump from Sid the Science Kid's backyard, because it is a habitat. Dr. Seuss in the meantime, is imploring kids NOT to pick flowers, because flowers are somebody's home. I'm fairly certain that is communist or something. You can't pick flowers?!?! Hello! What do you think God put them there for?? Anyway, moving on. Beside these annoyances, there are several categories that I put TV shows in. They are as follows:

1. The Subtle Message Shows: Dinosaur Train (evolution), Sid the Science Kid (ultra enviromentalism, vaccines, etc.)

2. The Disrespectful Kid Shows: Clifford, Arthur (sometimes the kids are sassy and rude to each other or their parents which really annoys me. Also, after checking out an Arthur book from the library in which the 8 year olds play spin the bottle at a birthday party really turned me off to that)

3. Last, but not least, the SUPER ANNOYING shows. They include Barney and Daniel Tiger. Now, I realize Daniel Tiger is a derivative of Mr. Rodgers and it's probably un-American to hate it, but it is basically a preschool-themed cartoon musical. And if I hear the song 'If you have to go potty, STOP and GO right away...' one more time, well...I just might rip those bunny ears right off the TV. Looks like Daniel Tiger's on the black list.

That leaves Curious George and Bob the Builder. Can we fix it? Yes, we can!