Friday, August 07, 2009

Purgatory and BBQ Sauce

If there was such a place as purgatory, I have determined that it would have something to do potty training small children while listening to rap music and with the smell of patchouli wafting in the air. That would be punishment all right. Enough to make me want to purify my soul reeeeeal quick. Seriously, I forgot how much I hate potty training. If I didn't hate buying diapers even more, I would let them pee themselves from now to all eternity just so I could avoid this scenario:

'Pa-eeee! Pa-eeee! Mon! Mon!' (Translation: Potty! Potty! Come on! Come on!) This statement must be taken seriously, and acted upon quickly, or else there might be no reason to sit on the pot by the time we get there. Get my drift? So, at the sound of 'pa-eeee!' I must immediately jump up, run to the bathroom, where we throw on the midget-sized toilet seat, strip off clothes and diaper and hastily plop the buns down on the seat. This is also complicated by the fact that I have a newborn who nurses quite frequently. Once in proper potty-ing position, you get to sit and wait. And wait. And wait. And sixty-six percent of the time, you get a big fat nothing. After sitting there for five or ten minutes, coaxing a small child to pee, they proudly declare 'All done!' despite the fact that nothing has been done. Nothing, that is, but wasting precious minutes of my life sitting on the edge of a bathtub waiting the poop that was not to be. There are also the times when we reach the bathroom only to discover that the deed has already been done and there is nothing to do but clean up the aftermath. There are times when we get there in time, and there is actually success, and those times are exciting! Katie gets such a proud look on her face and waves 'bye-bye' to her poop. Good times! If it weren't for those successes, I'm pretty sure I'd lose my mind. (Oh, and in case you are wondering if I am insane for potty training Katie with a three week old baby? Yes, I am insane, but no, it was not my idea. She asks to go, wants to go, so I figured I'd better take the hint and encourage it now)

I did mention BBQ Sauce, which I am sure is the most rip-roarin' thing on your list of must-reads today, so here goes. Despite the blight that has struck my tomatoes, I have been able to ripen some of them in my window. I had enough today to start a batch of BBQ sauce to can. Never done that before, so I had to try. It shall be Spicy Jalepeno BBQ sauce, in honor of my Mexican ancestors, and hopefully it turns out good. What? BBQ sauce isn't Mexican? And I don't have any Mexican ancestors? Well, I wish I did. Their taste in food is muy bien.

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